The Diff between men and women

If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, theywill call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they willaffectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla,Peanut-Head and Scrappy. EATING OUT: When the bill arrives, Mike, Charlie, Bob and John will eachthrow in $20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of themwill have anything smaller, and none will actually admit theywant change back. When the girls get their bill, out come the pocketcalculators. MONEY: A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need butit's on sale. BATHROOMS: A man has six items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shavingcream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the HolidayInn. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroomis 337. A man would not be able to identify most of theseitems. ARGUMENTS: A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a newargument. CATS: Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, menkick cats. FUTURE: A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife. SUCCESS: A successful man is one who makes more money than his wifecan spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. MARRIAGE: A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but hedoesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change andshe does. DRESSING UP: A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants,empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get themail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals. NATURAL: Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night. OFFSPRING: Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. Sheknows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends,favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in thehouse. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing.